Step One: Get Agent

There are always milestones that happen in this rode to a new level. When I finally signed the letter of resignation for my job in the chorus and sealed into reality that my future would be “anything other than this”, somewhat by intentionally pushing myself up against the wall in order to force myself to move from a comfortable position, taking the risk to become something truly more, I was scared. I was truly scared, really, that I would be sitting on my butt at this point, getting absolutely nothing, thinking ‘I should never have left the chorus.’ These kinds of milestones tend to pass somewhat antic-climactically, one challenge overcome and the sights almost immediately on the next.

But yesterday, when I had my first audition since 2003 for a German agent, I knew that something significant was taking place. I went in with confidence. I was nervous, yes, but confident. I sang through the first aria (Florestan) and she said, with great energy in her voice “You are a REAL Heldentenor!” Cool. Someone else noticed.

Normally, in auditions, you sing through maybe one piece or two. I sang through my entire audition repertoire, four long, extremely difficult Heldentenor arias. The agent seemed very enthusiastic and wants to work together. She even said “I think I may have a Siegmund for you.” Siegmund (from Walküre) would be my absolute ideal role to begin my career. Thirty minutes later, the audition was over, and, exiting the hall, I re-entered the real world.

I have an agent!

Finding someone who is interested in representing me and sending me to auditions that she hears about through her “magic agent channels of communication” is something that, until this point, I have not been able to do. And, on the first try, after 4 years of waiting and working, the first one is interested. I have to admit that I, even considering this anti-climactic nature of looking at my own successes, find this unbelievably, fucking cool! Now, as I go out and sing for other agents, a lot of the pressure is taken off. When I audition now, I won’t be so much focused on whether or not I am worthy, but, rather, focused on what is important, namely, whether this agent is able to recognize my potential and use it to his and my advantage.

I thank God for this. This feels so good!

Something else kind of neat happened…the pianist followed me out after the audition and asked I he could have my card. Interesting. My fried B. knows him and I guess he arranges all kinds of concerts. That would be nice…some gigs.

Success. Ok, now I keep going.