Wagner? I don't even know her.

You take every kind of horrible complex that the pomposity of opera has given the layman, you mix it up, and multiply by 1000. The result is what it means to see opera at Bayreuth. Traveling to Bayreuth, some 4 and ½ hours away, I thought that I should remain somewhat casual for the performance, as the typical dress for an opera in Germany is everything from without jacket to tuxedo. Walking up the main drive to the hill upon which the Festspielhaus sits, I could see from some distance the gowns of every color and variation. Little did I know that my brown suit and elegant, dark purple button-down would be seen by the exorbitantly rich filling the Festival grounds as completely unacceptable. Well, excuuuuuuse me, people, I didn't get the memo that men were only to wear black and dark gray. This is everything that I hate about opera: the exhibitionist clothing, the conceit, the holier-than-thou, ivory tower, self-righteous condescension. It's all part and parcel to opera at least to some extent. But, at Bayreuth, it seems to be in some kind of testosterone overdrive.

Actually, there is an interesting mix at Bayreuth performances. There are the blue bloods and their kin. But, there are a very generous number of a subspecies that is specific to this Festival: the Wagner enthusiasts. These are the egg-heads who just can't wait until the next time that Lohengrin is broadcast on TV so they can sit and watch the whole thing, never leaving their seat, criticizing un-needed cuts made so that the opera can fit within the designated 5-hour time block, practically orgasming at some high moment in the music. We actually came up with a good name for these people, which seem to almost infest Bayreuth each year. They are the Wag-nerds.

Actually, a lot of it is completely beyond belief. My friend A. sang one of the main roles in the opera. I waited for her after the performance by the stage door and, sure enough, there were the Wag-nerds, waiting there for photos and autographs of all of their favorite Wagner stars. It's just kind of funny, because most of these people have names that no one, even most in the opera field, have ever heard of. Wagner is a specialty. Once you become big in it, you are stars but only to this kind of strange dichotomy of intellectuals and the affluent. A. actually had to go to a local bookstore the next day and just sign autographs at a scheduled time. They were all there lined up waiting for her. Unreal.

Die Meistersinger von Nürnberg was long. Real long. It started at 4PM and ended at 11PM. Yes, there were two 1-hour breaks in between, but even so, it was quite a long evening. This was the famous production that the great granddaughter of Richard Wagner directed. It is her first opera at Bayreuth as she takes over the Festival. It sucked.

Yes, it sucked. From 3-foot dildos and lots of naked people, to dancers with giant paper maché busts on their heads. It was Eurotrash on speed. It was tasteless, senseless, and deserved every "boo" that it received. Ah, yes, the boos. After the production, the audience clapped incessantly for the cast as it formed a long line, holding hands for a bow. The curtain closed and then opened again, this time with Katharina in the line. "Boo" yelled from every corner. I'd never seen anything like it. Not in Germany. These people were going crazy, just screaming at the top of their lungs. It was like the old days when riots and revolutions were always started after some nationalistic opera. It was kind of weird. You know how I said that it used to freak me out when Germans get really excited at a performance and start clapping in unison? Well, I think the idea of a bunch of Germans boo-ing full force at one of Hitler's favorite destinations with direct links to all things Nazi is even freakier. I was like "run away."

The highlight of the trip to Bayreuth, though, took place the next day—the dinner at the Wagners. I have one word: surreal. Ok, two words: really surreal. No, I need more: really, fucking surreal beyond belief. How many is that? The Wagners live right next to the opera house in some kind of manor house, filled with strange art and, of course, lots of paintings of the Great Master himself. It's a pretty big house and pretty lavish, but not a palace or anything. We were greeted at the door by Gudrun Wagner, the wife of Wagner's grandson (and Liszt's great-grandson.) A. explained that her husband was in America and that I was a friend. Gudrun took one look at me in my Janker and said "Ah, your friend. Your Bavarian friend!" obviously thinking that I was some kind of compatriot. I am not sure, actually, that the guests really understood the irony I intended with my traditional jacket, but, whatever…

Wolfgang received us, practically deaf and apparently practically immobile in the next room. Katharina was there, too. She is a weird one, Mr. Grinch. She is only 29, but has this voice that could just be deeper than mine. She seems to be the very strange product of a family with a profile a little too high and coffers a little too full. She actually went into the process by which she conceptualized Meistersinger with the full intent to get boo-ed. The night before, as she came out for her individual bow, this desire was on full display as she relished, apparently, the screaming at her. Very weird.

The dinner was one of the most beautifully extravagant layouts I have ever seen. It was gooooood. Very good. I should have snapped a picture! It was straight out of the movies, with variation upon variation of fish, roast duck, sushi, a chocolate fountain, etc., etc. Our company was good, and we had lots of laughs. I was a little embarrassed, actually, when the very personable Bavarian sitting across from me referred to me as a "Baden-Wurtemberger" about half way through the meal. When I corrected him and said that I am American, there was a complete uproar at the table; he didn't want to believe that I wasn't a Swabian, for some reason.

All in all, it was another surreal Bayreuth experience, complete with Gudrun getting completely sloshed, careening from place to place. Really the family is the strange mixture of intellectual, over-privileged and white trash. Hard to explain. In spite of grand-dad's overt anti-Semitism, there was a prominent book on the Wagners' bookshelves called "Judaism." Now, was that strategically placed, or what?

I learned a lot, actually, by going to Bayreuth this year. I know that I will definitely not sing there unless it is long into my career when I have become ripened through experience. The public there is testy and maliciously unforgiving. It is understandable, though, since many of them have had to wait 8 years for a single ticket (600,000 people apply for a ticket each year and there are only 60,000 seats available.) It's just its own world, you know. But not exactly the kind of world that I would gladly be a part of. Not now, at least, as if anyone is asking…

Tales from the Vaterland

Just a little snippet to brag a bit.

My friend Amanda is singing Eva in Meistersinger at Bayreuth this year (if you're not "in the know," this is a huge deal.) Anyway, she called and invited me Bayreuth to see her Meistersinger on Wednesday and then to stay over till Thursday because she wants me to go with her to some big party at "the Wagners." Yep, I am going to meet Katharina Wagner, the great-granddaughter of Richard and the woman who now runs the Festival.

This is so cool.

I hope I can get my Janker back from the tailor to wear. What is a janker?




More about traditional German apparel (in English):

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tracht

Booooring.

Welcome to the new secret site! Oooooh. So sneaky of me. This is just shy of requiring some kind of password or secret knock. I have a mind to call this the "He-man Woman Haters Club" like the Little Rascals. Of course, my "readership" is at least 50% women, though, so that might backfire…

What am I up to? Well, really I am just sitting at home working on my doctorate every day. I m making good progress and am on schedule (I travel back to the states in September to finish.)

I guess that's about it, really. Nothing exciting. My main focus shifted from getting prepared for my Staatsoper audition to getting finished with my doctorate. Then, when I return in October, the shift will occur again, as audition season starts.

Wedding

Yes, yes, I promised to change this blog location. I still plan on doing so, in case you haven't heard. You must contact me personally or leave a comment in order to be forwarded on.


It has been a few days since I was married to Christoph. The wedding was on Friday, and it is only now that I have caught my breath and can reflect enough on it so that those of you who could not be there can know what it was like.

Well, Chris and I were the first Civil Union in the Marriage Bureau (Standesamt) of his little town. The Bureau is a cute, little half-timbered house in traditional German style. We had no idea how the civil servant would react to having to do his first civil union service. In truth, he could not have been nicer, and obviously was happy to do it; he did a stupendous job, even bringing flowers from his own garden to brighten up the Bureau. He made a cute sign hanging on the main door, with quotes from Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. Chris said later that he could see tears in the man's eyes at moments in the ceremony. (The cartoons are Chris' doing.)



I thought that I was going to be able to be strong during the ceremony and hold back my tears. But, at some point, I was so overwhelmed with joy that the floodgates gave way and I just started blubbering. I thought to myself: "I have heard countless stories of how getting married is one of the most moving and joyful moments in someone's life. I have never understood that until this very moment." And, it was true. Friday was the apex of my life so far. I have never felt joy like I did that day.



And I felt so extremely blessed. When Christoph and I had arrived at his parents the day before, we could see that they had been working diligently for weeks to make this day as special as they could for us. They rented a tent for the garden, they found a wonderful country inn in the Odenwald where they planned the four course meal for more than forty guests, they co-coordinated an afternoon coffee (with 13 different cakes) at their home for after the dinner, they planned for and served a huge sideboard meal for the guests that stayed until the evening, they made rooms in their homes available for the overnight guests that had traveled a long distance. And all of this was a gift from them to us.

The day went off without a hitch. The weather was beautiful, sunny and in the 70s. The ceremony was fantastic. Our rings turned out beautifully—a gift from our friend Peter, a Goldsmith here in Pforzheim. (You all knew that Pforzheim is the jewelry capital of Germany, right?)



The whole day was so emotional, and I really think that I started to get dehydrated from all of the crying. But, I couldn't help it, I couldn't help but feel that I had done nothing spectacular enough in my life to have deserved this intense joy that I felt at the outpouring of love from those who were there and had a hand in the planning. Even more deeply intense, though, was the joy that I felt at having found a husband like Christoph. I am blessed; I just can't stop saying it. I don't want to get all religious on you or anything, but I thank God for this, from every part of my being.

The dinner was tasty (I can be a pretty harsh critic of restaurants.) I seldom have experienced a dinner served en masse taste so good…the meat was of very good quality, and even Christoph was impressed by the vegetarian selection. And the speeches, oh the speeches. Chris' mother gave a speech (I am going to translate it and include it in my new blog.) I am relatively sure that there was not a dry eye in the room by the time she had finished…as she talked about how difficult it had been for her to learn that Chris is gay, that it pained her to think that this would make his life so hard, and that his life was actually hard, very hard. "Then came Josh," she said. And everything changed. This is true, and was true for me, too.

Monika so moved us all, especially Chris' relatives as they could see the true emotion in her eyes. The several gay couples that were invited were deeply moved, too. You have no idea what a fantastic woman Monika is, but to stand up and give a speech, so from her heart, not breaking down, but driving forward, in front of all of her relatives about how proud she is of her gay son, emphasizing especially for the gay folks there that I am now her son, too, is the work of an extremely strong woman, and everyone saw it as just that—amazing. The performance of a superwoman, and just about the best mother-in-law one could wish for.

I think that is what made the day so amazing: it all sort of played out in this perfect way, so perfect that I could not have even dreamed it up being any better.

Betsy gave a wonderful "groomsman" speech. The people were absolutely enchanted with Bets, as well they should be. She made the speech funny, but also reminded us that, when I was staying in Darmstadt, Chris and I slept on a twin mattress on the floor of a practically empty room. I look back on that time and wonder how we did it. But, I know that it was this intense, instantaneous love that Chris and I had/have for each other that made even sleeping on a twin mattress on the floor seem like heaven itself. The crowd got a great laugh when Betsy, not realizing what she was saying, said "And, now, when things get rough, just remember what it was like on that mattress." It's so terribly difficult not to get yourself into trouble in another language sometimes…

Everyone ate well, and we all got into our cars to drive through the beautiful hills of the Odenwald back to Chris' parents'. Everything had been prepared while we were gone, and it looked beautiful. We all enjoyed each other's company, occasionally being interrupted by a game for the groom and groom, staged by my new sisters-in-law Jutta and Nicole.


We laughed and cried the whole day long, it seems like. I was extremely tired, after having had so little sleep in the nervous days before Friday. But, the energy was stupendous, and everyone seemed to have really enjoyed themselves. I am married now. I just can't believe it! I never really dreamed that I would get this lucky. Never.